Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
