I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize