I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize