he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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