my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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