I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I understand Curling. That high.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize