I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize