Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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