Acid is not a monday night drug
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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