It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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