Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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