So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
