Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
