There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Randomize
