Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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