His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
