Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
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