he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
