You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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