He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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