I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Its about making memories worth repressing
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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