I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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