operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
