didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
