Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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