I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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