please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
