Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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