I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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