It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
