I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
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