I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Hippo gnu deer
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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