Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
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