You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
