If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
