I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
