office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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