Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
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