Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize