Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
