Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
