I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize