this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize