I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize