If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize