He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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