Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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