i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
