we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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