Sponge bath it is.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
