Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
