i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
