and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
