How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
